Work and fun: An oxymoron?

** Names have been changed to protect the innocent (and the guilty too!) **

I don't usually use the words "work" and "fun" in the same sentence. Lately, I feel like I've complained a little too much about work. The building itself was built in the 50's, and is somewhat depressing (see photographic evidence below)

When I started there (originally in 1999), it had a very wacky, goofy atmosphere. :-P

Case in point... the "Gummy Bear incident" of 2003!!! One of the postdocs, we'll call her, uh, "Mary", is a very funny lady from France (she's Parisian AND Persian). "Mary" enjoys bubble wrap (which I give to her when we get shipments) and gummy bears!!

At some point, the gummies "Mary" had were...

BEAR-NAPPED! *dun-dun-dun*

She received the following image:

along with a ransom demand!

"Mary" ran around like a maniac, interrogating everyone. She even accused "Jane", the sweetest "mom" to everyone there. "Mary" was panicked, and of course we all were trying to keep straight faces, while snickering behind her back. The real culprit shall remain nameless, but needless to say "Mary" didn't suspect this person - as she said in her lovely accent, "no, no, no, it cannot be "Mr./Mrs. X" - he/she is too busy to do this mean thing". ;-P

Of course there were other incidents (a few examples):

** When "Scott M" gave "Jane" a Playgirl magazine wrapped in black tissue paper as a Secret Santa gift...

** When "Marianne" went around whacking people with a large, pink, plastic bat... and no that is NOT a euphemism...

** When "Jane" ranted about everyone laying claim to the colored sharpies used to enter experiments on the schedule - leaving her with the Black sharpie (uh, yes, she is African American). It was shortly after I started working there, and I was afraid she was serious!

I have my memories (and "Mary", "Marianne", "Jane", and "Peggy" are still there). It's not as wacky, but thankfully it is still "nerdy" - Cathryn's beta-cell birthday cake

for one of the guys being the most recent example (if you're interested, this is what a beta-cell is)... I may have to take matters into my own hands to bring back the wackiness. I'm thinking of using some bubble wrap... duct tape... maybe some pipettes (actual prank to be determined). Be warned! ;-P

P.S. Yes, her gummies were returned...
P.P.S.  Since Cathryn was not around during those wacky days, I did not really feel the need to give her a fake name.  However, if she really wants one, she'll get one.  From now on, you may call her, uh, "Cat"!...

Hockey!!

So, even though I am an LA Kings fan (not a Panthers fan) I enjoy listening to this!!!



As for the Kings, they have had a bunch of comebacks over the years, including this!!


And of course, hockey is known for it's physicality!!!


P.S. You will note the utter lack of "..." in this sports post. When talking about hockey, "!!!!!!" will be involved. If you have any problems with this punctuation use, go read about a boring sport, like golf - er, I mean please submit your letter in writing to the management and we will graciously take care of it. Thank you.

An open letter

Dear MTV,

I understand that those young whippersnappers from one of your shows, "Jersey Shore", are not happy with their salaries, and are demanding twice as much money per episode. Please consider that with people starving, the tragedy in Haiti, etc., giving the kids in the following clip more money might not be an efficient use of funds.

Thank you for your attention to this matter.

Sincerely,

Hannah

I am realizing...

... I can't find any poetry I've written in the past that isn't depressing.

... I can't think of anything new to write (and especially anything full of rainbows and sunshine!).

... there are so many things I want to post here, but don't feel comfortable enough yet to express.

I thought creating a blog would be cathartic and a form of therapy. The problem is, that the point of therapy is you have to be completely open and honest, and so far I can't do that here.

I know I hold back too much in life due to fear... fear of how others will react, fear of change, fear of nothing changing...

Hopefully little by little I will be able to express myself more.

Until then, if anyone's out there and still interested, please fee free to keep reading these random posts.

P.S. Do you ever feel like maybe you want to trade in your brain for a new, shiny one?

Once upon a time...

...I used MySpace. Due to my mood (see previous post), here's something I posted there - it pretty much still applies. Feel free to complete this on your own in the comments section, or comment on mine!

I Live in a world of my own making. It sometimes comes out burnt or inedible, mostly because I am not the greatest cook.

I Work way too hard. But on the plus-side I don't get paid enough!

I Talk to strangers. It's not my fault - they talk to me first.

I Wish that I knew what I wanted to do for the rest of my life – besides goofing off on the internet all day, of course. It's a very expensive hobby – what with the Ebay purchases (they have vintage M & M wrappers!) and ahem, "Mature" sites.

I Enjoy many things. They are listed on my MySpace profile. However, if you want the detailed list in order of importance, it'll cost you. I mean I was offering prizes for a correct guess - I can't just GIVE that information away for free, y'know!

I Look at hot guys, of course! I also look at myself in the mirror and wonder what picture would appear if I connected my freckles. Which one do YOU think is more fun?

I Find coins all over the place – in my car, couch cushions, etc. – I'm planning my retirement around it.

I Smell nothing. I live by my sense of smell. The air is sweet and fragrant, and none may pass without my permission! (- Didymus, from "Labyrinth")

I Hide my pain behind a smile. It's not healthy, but nothing is healthy these days, right? I hide my sex toys too, and I hope Marie's mom doesn't find out. ;-)

I Pray that my friends and family are happy and healthy, that the soldiers stay safe, and that I get a new car soon. Hey, I need a LITLLE something for myself – right?

I Walk down the street with my head held high after a new haircut. I also have a tendency to walk into things. My new hair doesn't get in my eyes as much, so that should change.

I Write bad poetry, then put them through numerous re-writes, criticizing every one. Hey, I am a Virgo.

I See my cat curled up on my bed. She looks soooo adorable!

I Sing only when I'm in the car by myself. Unless I hate someone enough to make their ears bleed.

I Can do jigsaw puzzles with a decent amount of speed. Even the "Magic Eye" ones! Isn't that a useful skill?

I Watch the boys in the gym lift weights like idiots. I'm waiting until some meathead drops the weight on his foot and cries like a baby – then I can laugh.

I Yearn to dance like nobody's watching, but I'm white - someone's ALWAYS watching, and sometimes pointing and laughing.

I Daydream that I live in a gorgeous house with my very own Johnny Depp (ok Marie, maybe I'll rent him out to you). We have two amazing kids, a never-ending supply of ice cream, and an amusement park in the backyard (complete with pirate ship for those POTC fantasies! ;-P).

I Want to find a boy that understands me – or at least has a nice rack.

I Cry occasionally, mainly at sappy shows like Extreme Makeover Home Edition. I also cry at weddings, but I don't laugh at funerals.

I Read for fun. What? Haven't you ever read a cereal box?

I Love being around my friends and family and being myself.

I Sometimes wonder what it would be like to be a cat – sleeping, eating, playing – how is that a bad life?

I Touch anything that looks soft – pillows, cats, maybe you?

I Hurt myself when I bottle my emotions up inside.

I Fear that my cat moves my stuff while I sleep.

I Hope that she hasn't found my secret stash of catnip. Hey, it's legal!

I Break out in dance in my kitchen. It helps burn off all the yummy food I eat. Plus, nobody can see me (or can they?)

I Eat quite healthy – er, except for all the ice cream – I need fuel for my workouts, right?

I Quit smoking years ago. It was the best decision of my life.

I Bathe in milk like Cleopatra – even better, it's CHOCOLATE milk.

I Drink things that start with the letter "M" – Milk, Midori Sours, and Mojitos – they do a body good!

I Stop working, and surf the web when my officemate steps out - and yet I still get my work done.

I Save every letter and photo I can. "Memorieees, misty water-colored memories…"

I Hug my friends and family whenever I can. Anybody need one?

I Am wondering when this will end. I have some important Web Boggle games to play!

I Play Web Boggle quite a bit. I do better at it when I've had a couple drinks.

I Miss my sister because she didn't come home for Spring Break. I also miss my friends – Karyn, Amy, Steve, and their baby Emma. It would be easier if those 4 punks had MySpace pages dammit!

I Hold my friends and family close to my heart. It gets a little crowded sometimes, but it's cozy.

I Forgive the creator of this survey, because I have to forgive myself for feeding into their obsession.

I Drive myself crazy sometimes. I was always bad with directions.

I Learn something new every day of course! Unfortunately my memory sucks, so I have to relearn the lessons the next day.

I Have a wonderful circle of friends and family.

I Don't know how to ride a bicycle. When I was little, every bike I had got stolen, and my parents stopped buying them for me. You're weeping for me now aren't you?

I Made this very yummy fruit salad once. And it had nothing to do with the fact that the fruit was soaked in liquor – really!

I Kiss a select few people. Unless I've had a bit of "liquid courage".

I Believe the children are our future. Teach them well and let them lead the way...

I Wait for the day when the man of my dreams sweeps me off my feet. Or maybe just the day when I can get a good night sleep.

I Need a few days of pampering with my friends.

I Feel tired – it's been a long week.

I Know that Xanax will not solve everything – just MOST things...

I Wonder who wrote the book of love.

I Am done! Oh thank goodness! Web Boggle here I come…

Needing humor...

Woke up feeling stressed, and "not so good" (and am having writer's block at the moment). In the meantime, from one of my favorite sites (a webcomic for nerds):

Water, water, water...

All this rain has prompted me to think of the symbolism, meanings, and sayings related to water, and the various ways it makes us feel...

Meanings & Symbolism: Rebirth, cleansing, life, change, emotions, intuition...

Quotes & Sayings: "raining cats and dogs", "drowning in paperwork", "drowning in debt", "getting along swimmingly", "fish out of water", "don't make waves"...

How it makes us feel: Peaceful and serene, sad and lonely, happy...

Lately it feels like a few, ok all, of these apply to my life...

* I am undergoing lots of change in my life... I have been living in a fantastic place in Pasadena with two fantabulous (fantastic and fabulous, in case you needed a translation!) gals. The owner is now selling the condo. Eff. I still don't know what I'm going to do, and am trying not to panic... I hate hate hate moving. *sigh* Did I mention I hate moving?

* I would say ~ 55% of my days I feel I am drowning (mostly in paperwork - but also doggy paddling financially, just because I am not where I thought I'd be). Really, there are SO many people worse off than me (e.g., everyone in Haiti, abused people/animals, Somali refugees), but of course, as humans we tend to focus inward so much and on our own lives... So, I guess since I'm human, that's what happens sometimes!

* Also, I am still trying to figure out what changes need to be made to make me happy, as I can't remember the last time I was peaceful and serene... these include doing some cleansing of my body and mind. Ok, actually, my body is fairly cleansed - I just need to get back to my workouts, and continue to maintain balance in my diet! As for my mind, I guess it could use a little bit of a wash (ok, this word isn't in my list, but it fits with the theme!). Accordingly, I will get a better handle on my emotions, and try to "get along swimmingly" with as many people as possible. More importantly, when I can't get along with someone, I will stop wasting my time stressing over what went wrong. I used to try my hardest to not "make waves" and cause trouble for anyone else, but it was often at the expense of my own emotions or feelings. (Ok, actually, I am doing much better with this, but of course there's always room for improvement!). I may try "making waves" in a positive manner though! The last step to the emotional "laundering" is figuring out why I feel like a "fish out of water". Just about every time I vent/bitch/kvetch to Cath about these feelings, she reminds me that I'm not the only one who feels that way or has experienced whatever it is I'm experiencing. Of course she's right (she's a smartie-pants), and deep down I KNOW this, but I still have these sad and lonely feelings. Maybe it's because it has been a struggle meeting people (i.e., boy-type people)... maybe it's because I wish I was more extroverted in general... or a combination of the two, who knows... A few girls I know seem to meet new people easily (of course this is just my perception, so I could be wrong - see my earlier note about how humans focus on our own shit!). I'm jealous of this and I admit it. There have been a number of times with 4 or 5 girls hanging out (sometimes it happens with 2), and I feel isolated and the "extra wheel". It's not their fault - it's up to me to shake off these feelings and deal with it...

* Finally, I will follow my intuition - which unfortunately gets buried under those pesky emotions (when they get the better of me)!

Hopefully all this will create a "rebirth" of sorts...

Along with this water theme, here's a bit of writing from my college days:

Splash

We jumped in puddles

happy and carefree

TV our after-school parent

we watched our reflections on its face

distorted

changing to fit images

we're expected to be

Splash

We fell into those puddles

drowned

the carefree days washed away with the rain

washed away with bright yellow slickers and boots

lunchboxes with Snoopy

or Jem or Thundercats

rusting and wasting away

Splash

I still like yellow rain gear

Splash

I still love those old shows

Splash

I still play in puddles

Don't tell anyone

Well, it's "raining cats and dogs" and I should get back to the hockey game.

Now, a question... What's your favorite water-related story? dream?

Thanks for listening!

Welcome to my world...

Ok, decided to give this a try, as my roomie Yen has a fabulous blog, and I enjoy reading hers. Not sure who will feel the need to read mine, but I used to write a ton... and enjoyed how cathartic it was! Maybe this will help vent out some of my emotions, and decrease how I sometimes feel like exploding.

In any case, to those reading this... welcome to my crazy, mixed-up world!! =)